just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize