U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
