Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
