I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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