I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
