Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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