I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
