im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
