What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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