i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
