i barfeds in our rink
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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