She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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