living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
