i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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