so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Panties = found
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize
