Porn is love you can see.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize