she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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