Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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