Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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