Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
