hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
