guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
