Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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