it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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