There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
