I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
