There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize