I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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