If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
