gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
