I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
