she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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