Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
