Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
