Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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