I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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