thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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