He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Well I just put wine in my tea
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
