You made me cry and you don't even care
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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