This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize