so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
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