I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
