Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
