It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Randomize
