I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
