As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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