We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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