i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
