Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
