You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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