And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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