How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
